Buttoms Up, For The First Time
by Sickly
Summary: Now ... It's Adult Time........


Disclaimer: I own none of the Final Fantasy Characters and wrote this story just for fun.

Warning To The Youngins, This Story Aint For Ya'll. With all that out of the way, its time to get sick!

Stick Sickly Presents

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**Bottoms Up, For The First Time**

Part I – Slymy Situation

Cheers and chants roared throughout the arena as the thousands of spectators waited restlessly for the main event. Her first concert since the destruction of Vegnagun had developed a craze of anticipation amongst the entire population of Spira. It was due to be Spira's official celebration.

Suddenly, the lights surrendered their power to darkness, leaving every person hidden, even to themselves. Camera's flickered their bright flashes toward the central stage of the circular stadium. Long seconds past, then…

_What can I do for you… you… you…_

Deafening screams erupted as the line's trailing echoes faded away. Slowly, the beat developed: kicks, drums then melody. A huge explosion of fireworks decorated the atmosphere, illuminating the stadium with scatters of brilliant colour. At the centre of the convex ceiling dropped a sapphire beam of light that bathed the performer at centre stage.

Yuna smiled at her screaming fans, gripping the wireless microphone close to her anxious lips. Guitarists and drummers began to circle the air aboard aerial skateboards. She counted the beats with hip footsteps, calculating her cue with ears focused on the instrumental. This was it. She twirled around, petite black skirt swinging a little high, winding up more than just a few men.

Two dancers shot up from the ground to either of her sides. Everything was going according to plan. The pre-recorded chorus came to an end and so lyrics began to flow to her lips:

_Far beyond the hazy borders of my heart_

_I can see a place_

_It's something like this_

_Every now and then I don't know what to do_

_Still I know that I can never go back_

_All the things I've seen_

_In those hazy dreams_

_Can't compare to what I'm seeing now_

_Everything's so different_

_That it brings me to my knees_

_And though, I know, the world of real Emotion_

_Has surrounded me_

_I won't give into it_

_Now, I know,_

_that forward Is the only way my heart_

_Can go_

_I hear your voice calling out to me_

_You'll never be alone_

_What can I do for you_

_What can I do for you_

_What can I do for you_

_What can I do for you_

_I can hear you_

BOOM! The sound of crackling thunder shook the arena, bringing the music to fatal silence. Yuna and her two dancers remained fixed in eccentric poses. Lost murmurs traveled among the spectators whom were expecting the second verse. Another loud bang erupted and up came a figure from beneath the stage.

It was a dark-skinned man, dressed in baggy black jeans and an apparently oversized basketball jersey. The mic in his hand hinted his purpose for being on stage. Another loud bang of fireworks erupted and everyone on stage revived from their statue imitations. Even the music continued from where it left off and the guest star stepped up:

_This is the motherfuckin' remix…_

_Slyme be the **name** of the brother on the **track**_

_Got skill and **game -** a killer dressed in all **black**_

_Fuck a dress sphere - you can already see I'mma **real Gunner**_

_Catch a bullet with your brain I'mma make you **feel dumber**_

_Mind lives high in the sky - after this I'm **gon' get beer** _

_Aint nothing hotter than Yuna in a **Songstress sphere**_

_So fuck Leblanc – pardon me – fuck **Le-cunt**_

_I'll fuck that ho without a condom on, now that's a **stunt**_

_No pussy getting stabbed coz my dick's so **blunt**_

_But – But - But my mind's ten times sharper than Paine's **blade**_

_Your style ten times faker than Rikku's clever girl **facade**_

_What – What – What? You'll be surprised when you see my big **balls**_

_Don't worry if your mouth's a little too **small**_

_Coz I'll find a way to put my sack and stick in it **all**_

_Or hit in her ass - 'till the bitch cum, I aint **through**_

_Have 'em asking me - 'What can I do for **you?**'_

Snapshots were taken throughout his full verse. While he was busy on the mic, Yuna had been performing a dance routine. Ignorant to Slyme's controversial lyrics, the fans uproar did nothing but grow.

Yuna continued to dance as scripted during the closing chorus. Arguably Spira's finest rapper, Slyme nodded his head and stomped his feet with the beat's rhythm. The High Summoner twirled for an ending. Slyme yanked her leg up from behind the knee. The two stars gazed into each other's eyes until the stage faded black.

_**(Backstage)**_

"That was a great performance, Yunie."

But the fatigued songstress yearned for nothing more but the refreshing complements only pure water could give. The choked water bottle poured its contents down her throat, revitalising her worn out singing tools. She emptied the remaining half of the bottle on her head and let it run down her sweaty face.

"I've got to admit, you surprised me today."

"How?" Yuna asked. Drips of water were wiggled off her wet hair, some landing on Rikku's face. "Oops, sorry," she giggled.

"You never told me you recorded a track with SLYME!" The crazed fan complained, unconcerned about the little shower. Despite the knowledge of her admiration, her cousin felt it necessary to punish her by concealing her association with him. "You know how big of a fan I am!"

"But, Rikku," Yuna started, now undoing her boots' laces. "Do you even know what stuff he says in his songs?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" Rikku said, rolling her eyes indifferently. "It's the **_way_** he says it that's cool! Get with the program with Yuna!"

Liberated toes frolicked in fresh air. "I **_was_** the program, Rikku." Yuna was sitting on a pink bench, busy fingers working to unclip the necklace from behind her neck. "I only did the track with him for promotional purposes. Not to mention, my record label thought it would be such a great idea since half of Spira love the guy. You know, just because he's famous it doesn't make him a better person. I should now, I mean, I was a High Summoner. And I know you wouldn't look at me differently either way."

"Yeah… I guess… But you still should have told me though!"

"I'm sorry, Rikku. I just didn't think it was that big a deal." She undid her blue, Songstress blouse.

Curious eyes questioned Yuna's actions. "What else have you been hiding from me? Don't tell me you're a stripper now!"

"Don't be silly." Yuna giggled. "I always take a shower after my shows." She took her top off, revealing her naked back to Rikku. "Besides, it's not like there's anything here you haven't seen before."

"Skinny dipping in hot springs doesn't count!"

"You locked the door, right?" Yuna was concerned about her privacy.

"Of course I did!" Rikku went to double check just in case. "Hey!" She complained at the first thing she saw as soon as she turned back. Yuna was threatening to let down her skirt. "Don't do that in front me!"

"What, you want me to shower with my clothes on?" She suggested, sarcastically. "Turn around or something."

Rikku did just that. The soft thump of her fallen undergarments still managed to invade her inattention. The presence of other life within the room disappeared. Still in doubt of her sensing abilities, Rikku turned to check just in case and found the results to be positive. Shortly, rapid thrashes of water echoed from the other room.

Rikku looked around the room for something to entertain her while she waited for Yuna. T.V was an option … before she discovered it was off and the remote was a couple of steps away from her comfortable couch. A pile of magazines lay upon the table in front of her. After wafting through each of their front pages, their value had depreciated too much for her tastes.

She sighed, her fingers overcoming the boredom by tapping on her chin. That's when she heard Yuna's loud shower voice. Still sounding pleasant through the shower. Her stray eyes accidentally found her cousin's black skirt sleeping on the floor. Coupled with boredom, prying interest crept up on her, easily overcoming the quickly dying morale.

She crawled over and lifted up it up with two fingers. It was nothing short of a short skirt yet it intrigued her for minutes. When the impish curiosity was on the verge on death, a white, laced, semi see-through thong became apparent. She picked it up and stretched it a little. It was **_so_** tiny. And here she thought Yuna had a bigger waste then her.

She disciplined herself with a hard slap to the face. Look at her, scrimmaging through her own cousin's private things. She needed to get out for a cup of coffee or something. And so she hurried, not considering telling Yuna about it or even considering locking the door behind her.

**_(Hallway, Backstage) _**

"Where is he?" The manager of the arena asked. He was sweating from fear.

"He – he could be coming any time, sir" the young employee notified.

"Damn it! All our rooms are fully booked for the night and one of the main events of the show doesn't even have a place to stay! How ridiculous! This is so embarrassing! I'm going to get fired over this." He pulled out a handkerchief to wipe the sweat of his face.

"What are we going to do?"

"Quick, check all these rooms!" He pointed to the line of doors around him. "Maybe there's a mistake in our books. One of these rooms might be unoccupied."

The young man did as he was told, attempting to open doors with the 'Come in' face showing, as oppose to the 'Do Not Disturb' alternative. Out of sheer luck, he stumbled over one that was unlocked. He fell over and saw provocative woman's clothing on the floor.

"Hurry up, will ya? He's coming this way!"

He rushed to his feet and kicked the black skirt under the chair, tidied up the magazines and asked if anybody was there three times in loud whispers. The room was dead silent and so he assumed it was empty. He rushed right out and closed the door just in time to greet the guest with an innocent smile.

"Mr. Slyme?" He said shaking the star's hand. "Just making sure your room is all tidy!"

"Brother, da name's Slyme so fuck dis whole mister shit."

"Of course," he said, together with the manager. "Please, en-enjoy your stay."

"Why ya'll sweatin'? Aint nuthin' better be wrong with dis room," he warned, pointing a finger at each of them. They shook their heads together. "Aight then, peace. Get one of 'em 'carry-your-shit-for-you' peeps to bring my luggage up in herr."

"Yes sir." They nodded again and rushed off.

"Them some weird dudes," Slyme said to himself, shaking his head as he watched them dart off. He twisted the door knob open and walked in.

**_(End of Hallway, Backstage) _**

The manager and his employee were bent over panting for air.

"No one was in the room, right?" The boss asked.

"Nope."

"You sure?"

"Well," the employee began. "There was this … skirt on the floor but no sign of its owner. So I just kicked it under the chair."

"Damn it! I need you to watch that room just in case the person returns. And when they do, don't let them in! No matter what! We can't afford to anger our top paying customers."

"Yes sir."

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**A/N**

So how'd ya'll find dat chapta? – Just playing. Didn't get around to putting in some trademarked **_Sickly Action _**in it but rest assured the next chapter will have plenty. So all you Sick Stick Sickly fans don't have anything to worry about. I'm going to get to the whole **_Bottoms_** Up, thing.

We're going to get real sick in part two … when Slyme meets Yuna under peculiar circumstances … and Rikku comes back to find Slyme and Yuna doing what … that is, if she can get past the manager's guard …

Reviews People. Flamers are free to flame all they want – provided there's a reasonable point their trying to make. **NOTHING'S** too sick for Sickly.


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